Playboy's comedy, barfing cartoons
Before I moved to Atlanta there was a comedy site in the town I lived in that did all the humor for Playboy's site. Their comedy was pretty dumb, I thought.They had flash movies of celebs doing silly stuff and people barfing on themselves and whatnot. I mean, normally people barfing on themselves is sort of funny, if you overlook the nastiness of it, but I don't like seeing cartoons barf.
When I am king, cartoons will never barf.
I tried to get the site to hire me because I figured they must be relying on either shaved yaks or drunken snails for their comedy, and I am funnier than both. A sober snail could take me maybe, but they're all on the sauce.
So the lady I talked to suggested that I do a top ten list to prove that I am funny. I only came up with about 5 things on the list. The only one I remember is this:
It's okay to drive with your bare ass, but honking the horn with your nuts is just obscene.
And softly, in the distance, you can hear the snails and yaks saying to one another... "Christ, that guy sucks."
Anyway I called back with my top 5 list, but the company had gone out of business. Seems their religious financial backers decided it was against their beliefs to be funny for the porn purveyors of Playboy, so they dropped the contract. To celebrate dumping their largest (and only) client, they promptly went down like a legless goat in a tightrope match.
Sadly, my comedy is still unknown to Hugh Heffner. One day, though. One day!
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