Johnson gets yelled at
Johnson sat in his boss's office, right leg crossed over left. His left leg tapped like a jackhammer. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap.His boss was excited about something. He had made a mistake. He had coiled like a steel spring and sailed through the air. He had known himself and true beauty at the same time.
"What the fuck were you thinking?" his boss demanded.
"I don't know. I just wanted to share something I guess."
"Well you're damned lucky no one got hurt. You're lucky Gordon Thunkwaller is such an eccentric old fart, and took it so well. You could have cost us all our jobs."
Johnson had slid across about two feet of Scandinavian table and fell into the laps of two very rich men. One of whom was Gordon Thunkwaller
Gordon Thunkwaller had enough money to buy them all Scandinavian tables of ridiculous proportions. He was so revered, and had so much money, that he had been given an office with a door at Johnson's job, even though he was never there. Johnson was pretty sure that he would never have an office, or a door for that matter. Gordon Thunkwaller probably had hundreds of them at different companies who were hoping his money could keep them in business.
Johnson began to daydream as his boss yelled at him about diving onto the table. His favorite faydream, a huge and terrifying barbarian with a wide sword fully five feet long, came to mind. He liked the barbarian. He thought about him a lot. Sometimes the barbarian spoke or shouted in his mind, but his speech sounded like "Fub hubbub hub bub fub!", so it was totally incomprehensible.
He imagined the barbarian being yanked through time to appear, sword in hand, in the laboratory of a startled scientist.
"Fub?" said the barbarian in Johnson's daydream.
"Uh," said the scientist.
Johnson focused on his boss. Lips moving, check.
As Johnson returned to his daydream, he imagined the barbarian and the scientist chatting placidly with one another, like actors on a break in shooting a movie, then leaping back into character once his attention returned.
"Raaaaaar!" the barbarian shouted, menacingly.
"Really convincing," Johnson thought.
Johnson focused again. His boss was staring at him. Oh fuck.
"Well?" his boss asked.
"Look, I'm really having a lot of trouble with my brain right now. I'm sorry I jumped on the table, but Thunkwaller thought it was hilarious. He's going to give us money or something, right?" Johnson asked.
"Well yeah, but shit man, that isn't the point. "
"As far as I understand it, getting money is exactly the point."
"Just go back to your desk."
Johnson got up to leave his boss's office. The barbarian bellowed in a foggy field in his head, shaking his huge sword.
"Oh, shut up" Johnson thought at him.
"Fub hub!" the barbarian said, spitting at the ground.
Johnson went back to his desk.
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