being an ass to South Africans
I work with a South African girl who is married to the man with the largest biceps in the world.I have seen photos. He's huge.
He's a personal trainer, naturally, so he's big into health and being healthy, which is why he would kill his wife if he knew she smoked.
She bums cigarettes off of me at work. I like talking to her because she is constantly appalled at my lack of manners.
One little burp and she gets all offended. People!
Well, apparently she is a pretty bad driver. A few days ago she misjudged the distance to the wall in her garage and slammed her SUV into the barbecue grill her husband was storing there.
She punched the grill clear through the wall into her kitchen. I asked her if they didn't have any brakes in South Africa, and she assured me that they did, but I couldn't help imagining it anyway.
People would come home from work, bash into the house, and hop out for dinner. Instead of red lights they would just have walls rise up out of the street for you to bash into. I find it all very funny, imagining those cars bashing into shit.
Anyway, the next day she hit a fence and knocked it over on her husbands prized Corvette, so he took her SUV away and is making her drive a Crown Victoria. She is mortified.
I saw her earlier today.
"How's it going, Officer?"
"Shut up!"
"(burp)"
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